I Just Lost My Job, Now What?
I want to tell you a little not-what-to-do story about the day I lost my job. Back in the summer of 2013, I decided I wanted to leave my job of 7 years and try something new. I was young and naive and didn’t put a whole lot of thought and strategy into my decision or search. I ended up at a company downtown and I was so excited to get to be in the hustle and bustle of being downtown. Despite getting to wear my cute sex-in-the-city heels, within just a few days, I realized that I had made a mistake and the job was not a good fit.
For the next 6 months, I struggled. And to this day, I still remember when I was called into my VPs office and she said that they were “restructuring” the department. Which was a kind way of saying, you are not the right person for the job so. You’re out. It was a gut punch. I felt blindsided. And as I rode the bus home that day I was terrified. How was I going to tell my parents I just got fired? How am I going to pay my rent or buy food? What’s going to happen next? By the time I got home, I was in a full-on tailwind spiral.
That day I wish I had the advice that I am about to give you. It would have made my life and transition a heck of a lot easier.
DON’T PANIC
I know this is a tough one and it’s easier said than done but let me tell you why. Panicking is just going to put you in a position where you start making bad, emotional decisions. This might look like posting on social media and telling the whole world you just got fired or bad-mouthing your former company or coworkers. This will only hurt you in the long run. I know it doesn’t seem like it at the moment, but I promise you, in the end, it will be okay.
Do this instead: Now, I’m not telling you to be a robot and not feel your feelings. Quite the opposite in fact. Give yourself time to feel that full range of emotions. You will feel anger, sadness, confusion, hurt, fear, and more. Take a day or two to really wallow and process what happened. Then you can approach your next steps with a clear head.
DON’T SIGN ANYTHING IMMEDIATELY
As I sat at my boss's table in her office my head was spinning with the news. She laid down a severance agreement in front of me, explained a few things, and had me sign it. I wish I knew at that time that you are under no obligation to sign anything right away.
Do this instead: Take whatever they are giving you with you to review when your head is clear or with a professional. Depending on your situation, you might be signing away your right to sue in exchange for a severance agreement and you need to understand the implications of that agreement. Signing it in emotional distress will do no one any good. Take this time to talk to HR if appropriate to review your termination, employee contract if you have one, and payout. This will give you a clear understanding of what is coming so you can prepare financially.
DON’T PANIC APPLY
Ever heard of the term rage applying? Well, there is also panic applying. As soon as I got home that day, I opened my laptop and started applying for any and every job through a stream of tears. I think by the time I was done, I applied to 15-20 jobs. I was in such an emotional panic that I didn’t even think I stopped to really look at what I was applying for.
Do this instead: What I wish I had done at that time was stop. Once the intense wave of emotion was gone, sit down and mapped out what I needed/wanted out of a company and role. This can include everything from what you want to be doing as your main responsibility to what kind of office environment you are doing it in. I wish I had done this before I ever took the job in the first place. It would have saved me a lot of heartache. Understanding what you need not only out of your day-to-day job but out of the company too is so important to making sure you are happy and satisfied with your work.
DON’T STOP BELIEVING IN YOURSELF
Losing your job no matter the circumstances is a blow. It can shake your confidence and your self-worth. Just remember though that your worth is not determined by your employment status. I struggled with this for a long time and have worked with many clients who struggle with this too. Just remember,
“Your self-worth is determined by you. You don’t have to depend on someone to tell you who you are.” Beyoncé Knowles