Is Your Tone and Facial Expression Sabotaging Your Interview?

I once had a dear acquaintance who was incredibly kind, outgoing, and expressive. But when she told a story she was passionate about, her tone, hand gestures, and facial expressions would suddenly feel overwhelming. At times, I felt almost attacked. Eventually, I gently shared this with her, and to her surprise, she had no idea she was coming across that way.

And that’s the thing: It’s not just what you say, but how you say it. Especially in interviews.

Recently, I worked with a client who kept making it to the final interview round but never landed the job. On paper, he was the perfect fit. Then, a recruiter gave him surprising feedback: He came off too aggressive.

He was baffled. But when we dug deeper, we discovered the root of the issue. Every time he spoke about a topic he was passionate about, his tone became sharp, his gestures amplified, and his face looked like he was mean-mugging me. He had no idea this was happening, and it was costing him opportunities.

Here’s how we fixed it:

Strategy #1: Smile While You Speak

It sounds simple, but it’s powerful. Smiling softens your tone, makes you more approachable, and helps you sound warm and confident, not harsh. You don’t need to grin the entire time (that can feel forced), but sprinkle in genuine smiles when you start answering a question, after you pause, or as you wrap up.

Strategy #2: Breathe and Talk Like You’re Speaking to Your Grandma

When he got excited, he spoke quickly and forcefully, unintentionally sounding aggressive. So I suggested this mindset shift: imagine you’re having a conversation with your sweet, beloved grandma. You’d still be passionate, but your tone would naturally soften, your pace would slow, and your body language would relax.

Our nerves and excitement can trick our bodies into coming across in ways we never intended. But awareness is the first step. Notice your tendencies, and then practice simple shifts to communicate the real you — calm, capable, and confident.

Are you getting interviews but not getting hired? Let’s change that. Interview coaching is more than mock questions. It’s about uncovering blind spots and building strategies to position you as the ideal candidate.

👉 Click here to schedule a free consultation. I’d love to help you get across the finish line!